Not the way to start the day
This morning I am awakened by Caleb standing less than an inch from my face screaming "Momma it's time to get up"...... let us just pause for a moment so that I can tell you that I am a lot of things, however "morning person" I am NOT.... none the less, up and at 'em I was after the wonderful 3 year old alarm clock sounded! So the first thing I do is look over at the clock beside the bed which read 8:56 and I'm thinking Hallelujah there is a God in Heaven and he has spoken to my child and taught him the value of sleeping in (especially since mommy stayed up until 1:00am paying bills and watching Army Wives last night) so outta bed I roll, with an "almost" smile on my face.... that lasted all of about 2 seconds, I rounded the corner to see Caleb's table covered in play dough and 9 million pieces of some cardboard box then into the kitchen where my wonderful son is playing with what are quite possibly the sharpest pare of scissors on earth at which time the following vision played out in my mind
"I plead not guilty by reason of insanity your Honor"
That little turd had gotten his bathroom stool drug it into the kitchen and not only gotten the scissors down, not only gotten his play dough out but had been into the KNIFE DRAWER TOO!! As I walked by I realized that it was open farther than the child latch (yeah WHAT A JOKE THAT THING IS) would allow and then realized that he had taken my Pampered Chef bread knife out of the plastic cover that goes over the sharp-ass blade!!!!!
Luckily for him he didn't cut himself, although I am not sure how between the scissors from hell and the knife that will cut concrete!!!
When I asked him how long he had been up before he decided it was time for mommy to join the party he replied "twenty years momma"
Little SHIT!!!
"I plead not guilty by reason of insanity your Honor"
That little turd had gotten his bathroom stool drug it into the kitchen and not only gotten the scissors down, not only gotten his play dough out but had been into the KNIFE DRAWER TOO!! As I walked by I realized that it was open farther than the child latch (yeah WHAT A JOKE THAT THING IS) would allow and then realized that he had taken my Pampered Chef bread knife out of the plastic cover that goes over the sharp-ass blade!!!!!
Luckily for him he didn't cut himself, although I am not sure how between the scissors from hell and the knife that will cut concrete!!!
When I asked him how long he had been up before he decided it was time for mommy to join the party he replied "twenty years momma"
Little SHIT!!!
posted by Krissi at
12:34 PM
4 Comments:
what? no pictures?
Yeah I was affraid that DHS would see, then I would have some splanin to do!!!
I'm with Sissy, wheres the pics, man? Ahh, to hell with DHS...they don't take kids from people who need it, what makes us think they will do it to us that are really trying??
Wow, he was quite busy during those 20 years wasn't he?!
That is FREAKY about the scissors and knives. Thank goodness he's okay.
It's often better to keep things on the down-low from DHS. With the number of bruises and black eyes and yes, even a broken bone, that Adam has had I'm amazed they haven't tried to lock me up yet.
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